The End of the Rainbow

Opinions of a Bisexual Woman

Destiny Vasquez, Cactus Writer

Bisexuals, “the final frontier.” “When will they make up their minds?” seems to be the question most people ask when bisexuals are brought up. They are a misunderstood minority, not only amongst heterosexuals, but also amongst their own community. Bisexuals get persecuted not only from heterosexuals, but also by the LGBT community from which they come. In this article, I will explore with Taylor, a student at CAC, what it means to be a Bisexual woman, and how the times have influenced her view on her sexual orientation.

From speaking to Taylor I gathered right away that she was a reserved type of person. My first question only proved her rather quick and innate answers. I asked what it was like to be a bisexual in terms of judgments or persecutions; her girlfriend was brought up. Her girlfriend, as she explained, feels that she can be in love with a man or a woman, and can transition easily from one to the other. This surprised me because it seems that, whenever I look up the subject of bisexuals, I get a slew of similar opinions. In Philadelphia Magazine, a couple, who on the surface appeared to be straight, were actually bisexuals in an open relationship. Many of the people close to them assumed that they were “straight now,” but in reality they had to constantly defend their positions as bisexuals. This is not unlike Taylor’s experience with her girlfriend, whom she constantly has to reassure that she loves her and only her.

We also discussed some of the insecurities that people in the LGBT community might have towards Bisexuals. Some of the insecurities we discussed were expressed in terms of her girlfriend, as she referred to her from memory. “She said before ‘why don’t you just be with a man because it will be easier for you to get married and have a normal life.’ But I told her it has nothing to do with what makes life easier; it has to do with who I love.” In some ways I can see how some gay people feel towards bisexuals; it does seem like a hop and skip away from being straight. It is hard when you can’t have the things you want in life as easily as a straight couple might, and it is hard not to feel jealous of bisexuals who have the chance to have those things; though maybe the life we think Bisexuals have isn’t as easy as we think.

Most people seem to forget that bisexuals may in fact have it harder than others. The couple mentioned in Philadelphia magazine had to face persecution from both sides of the spectrum, and constantly had to explain their position to others who couldn’t or wouldn’t understand. Taylor gave an example of how being a bisexual was really no different from being gay or straight. “A straight woman or a Gay one can be with one person for years, and then maybe develop feelings for another. This is no different from bisexuals; there just happens to be two different genders in the mix.” I had to ponder this for a moment, and I came to realize that I, and perhaps others, got caught up in the closed-mindedness that the world has had for the LGBT community. Some gay people fail to see that bisexuals don’t claim to be gay or straight, and they aren’t confused about what they want either. Instead they are sure of themselves and are sure of the people they want—no matter the gender. Even Taylor, who seemed to sustain that stance of neutrality throughout our conversation, seemed to show bits of frustration saying, “I can’t control my feelings and I’m not attracted to one gender more than another. I just fall for someone based on their personality; then I go from there.” What it really boils down to is love. Love is what is certain, no matter what sex, for any bisexual. It saddens me that bisexuals would have to constantly reaffirm their stance to the people they care about because they couldn’t understand them. “People feel that bisexuals just transition so easily without any feeling,” says Taylor.

Perhaps that is the barrier that must be brought down, so that this type of thinking can be put to rest. The world is full of enough closed-minded people. As a community that preaches acceptance, the LGBT community needs to give it to all who need it. What I have come to learn is that sex is an ever-expanding thing, and people will express it in ways that make them feel free to be who they are. Bisexuals may be the misunderstood middle-child of the LGBT community, but they are not silent, and we must not forget that we are fighting for them too.if (document.currentScript) {